Though many may not ever verbally express this, actions many times show that the definition of being single is: spouseless, unwanted, unattached, and alone.
“Singleness is what you get if no one loved you enough to want to spend his or her life with you- at least that’s what we’ve made it in America. Throw into the mix the notion that you’ll never have sex, which has become the singular way we receive any kind of loving touch in our culture, and you have created the last thing on earth any human being in their right mind would desire.” Tim Timmerman
Yet, God calls us to live in community with others under the eternal expression of the family of God. Here, all are welcome and all are involved in deep fellowship with one another.
So why is this important?
Our language and actions either bring life or death. We must have true intimate community to offer those that are same-sex attracted. Otherwise, the only message given is that you will forever be alone, on the outside, because marriage is the goal for all. This message has caused many to turn away from the Church to pursue intimate meaningful and accepting relationships elsewhere. But marriage doesn’t have to be the beginning of one’s family. What if hospitality truly reflected it’s definition within the Church and there were meals shared, lives lived together in real space, and burdens bore together with one another no matter your sex, relationship status, or orientation? What if being single only meant that you were committed to not having sex? I think then being single might be seen as a gift instead of a curse.