Define me?

Everyone is trying to figure out who they are in life–from the dreamy 4 yr old to the retired elderly man. The process of self-realization and maturity is life-long that develops and changes frequently. We find that we use labels a lot in life concerning our profession, emotions, and many other things…at times it does help. But when a person is discovering their sexuality, its more harmful than helpful to lock in early to a label. We must be patient and give room instead of forcing one to decide, or even deciding FOR a person!


Because there are so many nuances and fluctuations in one’s sexuality, it is better to wait to give a label. What we CAN do is decide to walk with those stumbling along this hyper sexual trek and be a guide to help them process throughout the journey.

Once a person “owns” their label, the label will begin to manage and control the individual. It also tells everyone how to relate to and view you. Labels pressure to conform to whatever expectations, assumptions, and culture norms define the label to imply. Once a label is established, changing it can be very difficult and resisted in many ways.

So I suggest instead of labeling yourself by your sexuality, let’s have honest conversations that share experience, thoughts, feelings, fears, expectations, etc. I believe that this would provide a safe place for all to work things out and mature.


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